Saturday, June 22, 2013

Once Upon a time

Once upon a time there was an evil land called America where people got rich by working hard _ The evil people of America would work all day so they could buy things, pay their bills and save for the future _ The evil people in America were so wicked they insisted on paying for their own medical care! (imagine that!) _ Many of these evil Americans even borrowed money from evil bankers so they could own the house they lived in _ To make matters worse these evil Americans would actually pay back the evil bankers the money they borrowed _ These evil Americans were greedy and selfish, they wanted to keep the money they worked so hard for. _ The evil Americans wouldn't share, they would say things like; "If you want an I-phone get a job and pay for it _ Then one day a brave courageous man saw the evil and spoke up, His name was Obama _ Obama said "just because you don't work doesn't mean you can't have a house" _ Obama told the people "Too many people in America go to work every day and I want to change that!" _ Obama explained "the greedy selfish evil hard working Americans got rich by stealing from you" "And I Barack Obama am going to punish those evil greedy selfish hard working Americans" _ All across America Good hearted Malcontents, Dirt bags, Criminals, Layabouts, Misfits, and Losers rejoiced _ The well meaning kind hearted Riff Raff made Obama their leader and he would make America fair _ Obama became President and in just 5 years there were millions fewer Americans working! _ Obama saw to it the hard working Americans were made to suffer. They paid more for gas, food, and medicine _ But Obama gave the good hearted Riff Raff Free cell phones, food stamps, and their own auto company! _ And they all lived happily ever after

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Fathers day , a cautionary tale

"The Mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation" I used to throw that quote out there all the time.I used it to justify why my lifestyle didn't conform to my peers. I was doing what I wanted to do, Living on my own terms while they sacrificed to raise a family. I was the smart one all right. However I saw something today that gave me what the folks at the AA meetings call "A moment of clarity".Something that made me realize that I was more or less rationalizing a big lie I was telling myself. I was celebrating Fathers day at my sisters house with my 87 year old father and my younger sister. I ran out the store to grab a bag of ice and while there I saw something I would normally ignore or pay little attention to. Maybe it was because it was fathers day I stopped and took notice of . It was a family, 4 kids a Young mother & father out for a bike ride and they stopped at the store for Ice cream bars. As I watched I had an odd sensation, like when you were a kid and Mom was chewing you out about something you screwed up and you couldn't look her in the eye and she grabbed you by the chin and forced you to. I watched this family For maybe a minute and I realized the opportunity I had squandered Fathers day wasn't this young guys reward for raising a family. He wasn't looking for a thank you from the kids for all he does. This was a day this guy could devote exclusively to enjoying his children. He gets to admire something he helped create, Something far more important than himself. Maybe even pat himself on the back a little bit for a job well done so far. He knows he'll never be done, that's why he goes to the crappy job every day. That's why he works overtime to make extra money for Christmas and vacation. So he can squeeze a few more days like this out of life. His is not a quiet desperation, it is a purposeful sacrifice for a goal greater than the freedom to do what you wish when you wish. And that's where I pooched it. On the scale of bad decisions mine is on par with "New Coke" I've had some of this swirling around my head for a while but today was that card you flip in solitare and the whole game rolls over in your favor. I used to tell myself I was living my life my way and to an extent that's true. But it's also been the path of least resistance.Here I am at 47 with nothing to show for it. Sure my friends love me and miss me when I don't come around for a while. But that ain't the same thing. I can now admit, I'm a little jealous of my best friend Dennis whose nightly routine involves checking in on each of his sleeping kids before he goes off to bed. Today I realized Thoreau was trying to tell me something,